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Some Days, It's Just Not Worth Chewing Through The Restraints Some Days, It's Just Not Worth Chewing Through The Restraints

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I'm Fine I'm Fine

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I've Done Terrible Things For Money Like Waking Up Early To Go To Work I've Done Terrible Things For Money Like Waking Up Early To Go To Work

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Well That's Not A Good Sign Well That's Not A Good Sign

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Holy Crap! Larry, Is That You Holy Crap! Larry, Is That You

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A Salt With A Deadly Weapon A Salt With A Deadly Weapon

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I Ate Some Pi And It Was Delicious I Ate Some Pi And It Was Delicious

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Surprise Sex Is The Best Thing To Wake Up To. Unless You're In Prison Surprise Sex Is The Best Thing To Wake Up To. Unless You're In Prison

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Try Saying "Do I Smell Popcorn" After You Fart, So Everybody Takes A Deep Breath. Try Saying "Do I Smell Popcorn" After You Fart, So Everybody Takes A Deep Breath.

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I Prefer Not To Think Before Speaking I like Behing Surprised I Prefer Not To Think Before Speaking I like Behing Surprised

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How Sarcasm Is Made. Step One. Ask Me A Question. How Sarcasm Is Made. Step One. Ask Me A Question.

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I Don't Like Morning People Or Mornings Or People I Don't Like Morning People Or Mornings Or People

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You Know The Little Thing Inside Your Head That Keeps Saying Things You Shouldn't You Know The Little Thing Inside Your Head That Keeps Saying Things You Shouldn't

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Of Course I Talk To Myself Sometimes I Need Expert Advice Of Course I Talk To Myself Sometimes I Need Expert Advice

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Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms Should Be A Convenience Store Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms Should Be A Convenience Store

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If History Repeats Itself I Am So Getting A Dinosaur If History Repeats Itself I Am So Getting A Dinosaur

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My Mom Didn't Raise A Dummy, And If She Did It Was My Sister My Mom Didn't Raise A Dummy, And If She Did It Was My Sister

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Dear Karma I Have A List Of People You Missed Dear Karma I Have A List Of People You Missed

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I Tried It At Home I Tried It At Home

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My Dog Thinks I'm Cool My Dog Thinks I'm Cool

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Naughty Nice Tried My Best Naughty Nice Tried My Best

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I Never Dreamed That One Day I'd Become A Grumpy Old Man But Here I Am Killing it! I Never Dreamed That One Day I'd Become A Grumpy Old Man But Here I Am Killing it!

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You Read My Shirt...That's Enough Social Interaction You Read My Shirt...That's Enough Social Interaction

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Be Careful When You Follow The Masses Sometimes The M Is Silent Be Careful When You Follow The Masses Sometimes The M Is Silent

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I Am An Enganeer Engeneer Enginear I'm Good With Math I Am An Enganeer Engeneer Enginear I'm Good With Math

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You Look Really Stupid With Your Head Like That You Look Really Stupid With Your Head Like That

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That's Too Much Bacon Said No One Ever That's Too Much Bacon Said No One Ever

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Hi I Don't Care Thanks Hi I Don't Care Thanks

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If You're Offended I'll Help You Pack If You're Offended I'll Help You Pack

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I Did Not Mean To Offend You, That Was Just A Bonus I Did Not Mean To Offend You, That Was Just A Bonus

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If You Love Someone Let Them Sleep If You Love Someone Let Them Sleep

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Almost Every Hand You've Ever Shaken Has Had A D*ck In It Almost Every Hand You've Ever Shaken Has Had A D*ck In It

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Drinking Rum Before Noon Makes You A Pirate, Not An Alcoholic Drinking Rum Before Noon Makes You A Pirate, Not An Alcoholic

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One Of Us Is Right One Of Us Is Right

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Admit It Life Would Be Boring Without Me Admit It Life Would Be Boring Without Me

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You Can't Tell Me What To Do You're Not My Dog You Can't Tell Me What To Do You're Not My Dog

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