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Hate When People Accuse Me Of Lolly Gagging When I'm Quite Clearly Dilly Dallying
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Well That's Not A Good Sign
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I Didn't Mean to Push Your Buttons I Was Just Looking For Mute
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I'm Fine
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I've Done Terrible Things For Money Like Waking Up Early To Go To Work
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Holy Crap! Larry, Is That You
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A Salt With A Deadly Weapon
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Surprise Sex Is The Best Thing To Wake Up To. Unless You're In Prison
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I Ate Some Pi And It Was Delicious
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I Prefer Not To Think Before Speaking I like Behing Surprised
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Try Saying "Do I Smell Popcorn" After You Fart, So Everybody Takes A Deep Breath.
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You Know The Little Thing Inside Your Head That Keeps Saying Things You Shouldn't
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I Don't Like Morning People Or Mornings Or People
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How Sarcasm Is Made. Step One. Ask Me A Question.
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Of Course I Talk To Myself Sometimes I Need Expert Advice
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My Dog Thinks I'm Cool
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If History Repeats Itself I Am So Getting A Dinosaur
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You Read My Shirt...That's Enough Social Interaction
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Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms Should Be A Convenience Store
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Dear Karma I Have A List Of People You Missed
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You Look Really Stupid With Your Head Like That
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I Tried It At Home
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Be Careful When You Follow The Masses Sometimes The M Is Silent
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My Mom Didn't Raise A Dummy, And If She Did It Was My Sister
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I Never Dreamed That One Day I'd Become A Grumpy Old Man But Here I Am Killing it!
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Naughty Nice Tried My Best
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That's Too Much Bacon Said No One Ever
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My Stomach Is Flat The L Is Just Silent
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Hi I Don't Care Thanks
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I Am An Enganeer Engeneer Enginear I'm Good With Math
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You Can't Tell Me What To Do You're Not My Dog
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If You're Offended I'll Help You Pack
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I Did Not Mean To Offend You, That Was Just A Bonus
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Almost Every Hand You've Ever Shaken Has Had A D*ck In It
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One Of Us Is Right
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Not Saying Kill Stupid People Remove The Warning Labels The Problem Work Itself Out
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